An ilovejesus.com response

Deleted · Post by **Deleted** » Thu Jun 28, 2001 3:28 pm

See some fundies ask the question Will Gays go the Heaven?]

Shawn posted:

When man looks to Scripture to support what he's already decided to accept, he will pervert the Word of God in order to justify his ways.

My response:

Like when a man decides to accept Jesus?

Rings true, no?

Deleted · Post by **Deleted** » Thu Jun 28, 2001 3:36 pm

Sorry, I can't read that shit anymore. People who equate homosexuality with murder don't deserve the fucking time of day.

Deleted · Post by **Deleted** » Thu Jun 28, 2001 3:52 pm

Alright, which of you is posting as Elmer0101?

I mean, this can't be genuine, can it?

http://www.ilovejesus.com/ubb/Forum1/HTML/000014.html

Deleted · Post by **Deleted** » Thu Jun 28, 2001 4:02 pm

Oh right. It must be in response to this one.

http://www.ilovejesus.com/ubb/Forum1/HTML/000011.html

Don't know whether to laugh or cry...

Deleted · Post by **Deleted** » Thu Jun 28, 2001 7:13 pm

I was under the impression that Elmer was one of us, but I may be thinking of another "Derek." Anyways, the funny part--whether he was serious or not--is that they took him seriously.

Oh Lord, great and merciful, hollow be thy name. We pray you watch over our computers and care for our servers, that they crash not. Please watch over our internal busses, and grant our caches speed, resistence to heat, and efficient, effective algorithms. Bless our mice, that they clog not with the spilt soda pop on our mousepads, and if it be thy will, O Lord, help us to afford an 18" Active Matrix monitor to enhance our ministry to those over the world in need of intelligence, enlightenment, and humor. And give us the STRENGTH AND ENDURANCE, O Lord, to read the incredibly long and nonsensical posts of your followers, that we may find the point thereof before nodding off. In Jesus' name we ask, Amen.

diana

Deleted · Post by **Deleted** » Thu Jun 28, 2001 10:17 pm

This one's sickening.

Prayer request: My daughter is living with a guy who is a witch. She is also involved in Pagan religion which goes against the third commandment. She once walked with God but now talks against Him. Please pray for deliverance and salvation for her and her friend.

Response: Dear Father pierce through the darkness, break the chains of bondage, and lead this child unto Your salvation. We bind all spirits of darkness, in the name of Jesus, and pray that blind eyes might be opened, and that this precious child will turn her heart to Jesus. In Your precious name we pray. Amen.

And if she doesn't, may you burn her in Hell forever, in thy mercy and goodness.

Deleted · Post by **Deleted** » Thu Jun 28, 2001 10:37 pm

"Dear Father pierce through the darkness, break the chains of bondage, and lead this child unto Your salvation. We bind all spirits of darkness, in the name of Jesus, and pray that blind eyes might be opened, and that this precious child will turn her heart to Jesus. In Your precious name we pray. Amen."

"The power of Christ compels you" (sprinkles holy water)

"THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!"

Norm

[This message has been edited by fromdownunder (edited June 28, 2001).]

Deleted · Post by **Deleted** » Thu Jun 28, 2001 10:39 pm

Notice that they don't specifically pray for the "precious" guy she's living with. Perhaps his mommy or daddy has to actually make a request for him before the Prayer Warriors ask god to save him.

Deleted · Post by **Deleted** » Thu Jun 28, 2001 10:41 pm

Originally posted by fromdownunder:
"The power of Christ compels you" (sprinkles holy water)

"THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!"

(tastes holy water)

"Wait a minute. This isn't water!"

Deleted · Post by **Deleted** » Thu Jun 28, 2001 11:15 pm

OK, A question.

Are they normal fundies or are they Ultra Fundies? Are normal fundies so whacked? Are these the cream of the crop - the special top of the list out of this world fundies?

I need a point of reference.